Writing Your Own Wedding Vows

Writing your own wedding vows can be your way of ensuring that your vows express your true emotions. The vows commonly used in weddings express your love for each other but they are usually not specifically written for you. While it is not necessary to write your own vows, many couples choose to do so to make sure that their vows are meaningful to them as a couple.

The first thing to find out is whether your religion binds you to any strict customs as to what you can and cannot say during your wedding ceremony. So make sure to get permission from your officiant before starting with this task.
Before you start writing your vows, ask your fiancé if he or she is as committed to writing them as you are. Some people are not comfortable expressing their personal feelings in front of others.

Make sure the vows are written well before your wedding date. Don’t put it off until the night before your wedding, this will just add to your stress and make it more difficult to write. Try not to worry too much about the length of the vows, it’s up to you how long or short you make them. All that truly matters is whether you think you have adequately conveyed the desired sentiment in your vows.

If you’re struggling to get started, here are some thoughts to ponder…

• Why do you love each other?
• What is it about your partner that makes your heart skip a beat?
• Was there a particular moment in which you realized that you wanted to get married to your partner?
• What comes to mind when you say the words, "marriage," "commitment," and "love?"
• What are your feelings about spirituality, children, money and growing older? Do you have common views on these important factors?

Maybe you’d like to include some of these promises…

• To love, respect, accept, honour and cherish each other.
• To be honest and faithful.
• To respect the individuality of each other.
• To be best friends.
• To be kind, trusting, giving and understanding.
• To bring joy and laughter into the marriage.
• Include in your vows the pledge to grow emotionally, mentally and spiritually together during the experiences of a lifetime partnership. 

If you are still at a loss for words, then look for some inspiration in books, movies or browse the internet. - Inspiration is everywhere.

When you have completed writing your vows, you may want to share them with your wedding officiant as he or she may have helpful suggestions for you.

Make sure to have a copy of your wedding vows on an index card at your wedding ceremony. You can choose to either read them or memorize them for your wedding day, but having them written down will make sure that nerves don’t get the better of you.